Step 24. Understand the dating language.

Apparently the dating scene is a little different here. There is a whole new language:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=U_pH-rDy1Dc

I work at site: I make lots of money and have no home life. My schedule is such that I have no time for a real relationship. I make too much money to care about clarity of speech; site is a magical uniform, singular place, and I drive there every morning. Pretty hot, eh?

I drive truck: I operate heavy machinery. I make lots of money. I don't believe in the usage of articles as per English grammar. Pretty hot, eh?

I'm on 24 and 4s: I work 24 days in a row, then have 4 off. I don't believe in mental health. Pretty hot, eh?

I am on shortchange: I just got off a ten hour shift and now have to stay up for 12 hours so I can sleep before switching from days to nights. Want to go out for the next 12 hours?

We just ran shutdown: I just worked 20 days straight. I am exhausted. Let's get plastered.

I'm thinking of getting a new sled. Maybe after Cancun: I believe in conspicuous consumption. Pretty hot, eh?

I'll see if the boss will lend to the crummy tonight: I live 100 kms outside of town in a trailer with 50 other men, and the only truck available is the one my foreman drives. I cannot leave the site without my express permission and his vehicle. So maybe some other time?

I REALLY should not complain, though, because this is all here say. I have only met stand up guys here. It all depend which circles you run in, right? But before the summer I plan on hitting up either "Gold Diggers Bar" or "Club Envy" at least once. I haven't even met these prototype men on account of my tame lifestyle.

Man, sometimes it is so funny to live here. Things are just so different from the rest of the world. It's killer. We have our own jokes, our own culture. Ha! I just love it. The snow is melting and the all-weather tires are going back on. Life's good.

Step 23. Keep faith in the youths.

I just finished writing a new curriculum on Wednesday night at 10 pm, and taught it for the first time this Thursday, 3 times! It is on Sexual Rights and covers a wide range of topics, including general rights, consent and coercion, healthy relationships, alcohol and sex... Lots of really cool stuff.

To see this presentation, with all it’s cool camera angles and everything, you can go here: http://prezi.com/v5s9to5wlwst/sexual-rights/ It’s hip with the youths.

We do two activities during the workshop. One is a Charter of Sexual Rights, Freedoms, and Responsibilities for their high school. They work in teams and have to come up with what they think should be the standards of expression. Something really interesting was that almost every group made a point of protecting the sexuality of a minority group often passed over: abstainers. Almost all the groups included a clause that said people should be able to be in school and not have overt sexualities of other thrust in their face, whether through what people wear, or do in the halls, or how others talk about it. I was really encouraged to see that. They said that one of the responsibilities of sexual expression was not to push it onto others.

It got me thinking about how most practicing Christians are in a sexual minority. Abstainers, including those who have had sex in the past, are underrepresented in media and pop culture. (The average age of first coitus in Canada is something like 16.5, so many high schoolers are actually "abstaining" and at the age I have them, haven't had penetrative sex at all.) And, just like homosexuals, their rights need to be protected. These are the guys whose peers are laughing at him because he's a virgin, or the girl whose friends exclude her because she has no firsthand knowledge. I hear about this pressure all the time, and it is as wrong as those who laugh at a male from liking other males or don't want to sit with someone in art class because she is a lesbian.




Christians have to give a wide berth to homosexual rights because of the prosecution that was borne out of the church. We shouldn't run around saying "we know what it is like to be a minority!" because in most cases, we don't. In so many situations organized Christianity has been a power player. But here, in sexual practices, we are deviating from the norm; or perhaps, the norm is deviating from the church. It is not unheard of for the social community to say that to NOT practice sex is unhealthy, that it is repression. It is a deviation from what is natural and good, from what is apparent in our nature. Where have we heard that before?

side note: by the standards of evolutionary science, do you know what else is 'unnatural'? brushing your teeth.

As the ecumenical community begins to accept sexuality as another part of life, a healthy, God given part of life, perhaps we can move sexual rights forward for all people. Perhaps that as we look around and say that we don't want media and peer pressure to dictate what is healthy sexuality, we'll be able to move forward the rights of homosexuals too. And, as a part of loving our neighbours, gays and all, protecting rights has to be seen as a practical application of love. Removing rights never showed anyone love and never stopped a person from believing what they believe.



Part of these sexual rights that we all have to move towards, though, include what all these students called "the right to non-obscurity: the right to not have the sexuality of others thrown in your face." It was a great encouragement to see these students really thinking about how their choices affected their peers.

Step 22. Enjoy the job perks.

What are the perks of being a sexual health educator? Well, for starters, there's the abundance of slightly used bananas.

Which tends towards a windfall of banana splits.

Now the real challenge- getting all that lube off the counter...

A kid passed out in my class last week! He went full on unconscious. It was after the slide show, so we weren't looking at anything gross. And I use illustrations rather than photos to provide a degree of separations for the students (and myself). He said afterwards that everything just came at him at once. It was pretty wild, especially considering he was 17. Fortunately the teacher was a level first-aider and the schools medic, so she dealt with things like a pro.

When I got up here and found that my job position had morphed between the time I accepted it to the time that I started, I wasn't stoked. I still have some mixed feelings about teaching kids how to put on condoms. The church here really supports it, though. The thought is that it is better for a practicing Christian to teach sexual health than someone who is making choices that are not sexually healthy according to out own curriculum. Who ever thought this would be my job? Crazy. I have taught in the classes of kids I know from youth group. It can be weird.

Thoughts? How much are we enabling by teaching kids how to put on condoms?

Step 21. Keep up with the scene.

We drove 5 hours to Edmonton to see some friends and catch a band I am a fan of, Deep Dark Woods. You have never heard of them, sure. That is probably why I am such a fan- another obscure folk band. The weekend was not only musically enriching, but a chance to momentarily escape the parkas and Sorel boots that have come to epitomize life in Fort. We were enamored with the novelty of walking on pavement and not snow!

See? We may live in a hole in the ice in the middle of nowhere, but we know our Indie music!

Only a word to the wise: if you are going to West Edmonton Mall, don't take five guys. For them, what could have been an amazing shopping immersion will end up being a lot of this:

This is a quickie. I am in Toronto for a research seminar. Will tell you all about this thrilling experience next time.

Step 20 - Get on site.

Site is where the money is! People come up here for the cash, not the scenery. But site life is hard- those guys really earn their money. Most are pulling 12 hour days for 14 to 21 days straight. It's just working, eating and sleeping. Site workers often comment on how their life is a lot like prison. There are even guards to keep them in line.Living quarters really aren't easy on the eyes. Home sweet home, anyone?

Every week or two I get the brilliant idea to quit what I am doing to go earn a ton of money on site. Then I could take that money and blow it all on one great adventure. But then I remember I don't have a trade or the physical stamina that these jobs require. And working a monotonous job just for the money would drive me NUTS! But a girl can dream, right?

And so, I work for Syncrude now!

No, not really. But last week I had the very unique opportunity to go up to camp and talk to the guys about syphilis. Right now the Regional Municipality of Wood Buffalo is amidst a syphilis outbreak. It is a fascinating combination of epidemiological factors that typify the very specific circumstances that Fort McMurray finds itself in- a large transient population, a growing population of immigrant from nations where syphilis (and HIV) are endemic, a busy pool of commercial sex workers, and a very rural (read: stigmatizing) cultural environment. This culminates in a social reality that limits discussion on sexual health while the bacteria is introduced at a higher than average rate. What does all this mean? Syphilis, a highly infectious-though highly treatable- bacteria, is running wild. So time to get the message out; quickly now, over 200 km of backwoods highway and 30 more of unpaved site road!



Apart from talking with kiddies about where they should and shouldn't put their goods, I am supposed to get up to site and distribute information and 'harm reduction supplies.' The Health Promotions Centre practicum student and I went up to a local site last week and spent the lunch hour getting these materials into the hands of workers. Ever wonder what 500 sexual health goody bags look like? Wonder no more:



We hit up about 126 unique individuals in the course of an hour. Apart from the condoms in the goody bags we gave away, an additional 200 were collected. In total, we went through 700 condoms in an hour. Not many people can say that.

We also heard some pretty scary stories from management. At one point, this camp we went to had a CSW (commercial sex worker) living underneath a housing trailer over the summer. She would come out at night and turn tricks. This carried on for a while before she got caught. Most of the time the sexual activity at camp is between staff, with visits into town to see CSWs, but every once in a while we hear of something like this. What a nutty place.

A lot of the companies up here want the education for their guys, but camp management is resistant. Right now I am in the middle of a tug of war between one of these battles. There has been a lot of "come up on the 24th!" and "we don't want you here- all 5000 guys work all 21 days completely celibate!" It is uncleear when I will be hitting up another camp. So, until then...

Step 19- Follow the lights.

One of the big complaints about living in Fort McMurray is that there is nothing to do but drink. And while local establishments do provide ample opportunity for one to find oneself briefly in possession of alcoholic refreshment, I just don't get how anyone can complain of boredom. What does anyone expect of any city? How is one city "more fun" than another? We have a movie theater and everything (yes, I realize how pathetic that sounds). Granted, coming from Abbotsford, my standard of an "interesting" city is quite low. A city is what you make it. If you are a boring person, you will be bored. And if you aren't...

It was only a matter of time before a bunch of us got into our trucks and drove around for hours trying to spot the northern lights. One of the benefits of having friends who are tourists is that they are not afraid to be tourists! They'll say “let's go drive northward!” And we'll say “okay!”

It started at Tim Horton's, with the necessary pre-adventure provisions. It was the usual suspects.

To the cars, gentlemen!

Our first stop, in hopes of seeing the lights, was Fort McKay, about an hour out of the city. For some reason we thought it would be a good idea to get out of our trucks en route and take pictures in the middle of the road. Yep- it's a four lane highway. And yep- we are this bad at taking co-ordinated photos.

We carried on right into McKay, which is a reserve. The Germans thought it would be interesting to see where First Nations people live. Once they saw it was just houses, they weren't very impressed. At the end of the road we got out and enjoyed the novelty of being in the middle of NOTHING. Here's the view towards the end of the road.

Time for some impromptu shoe-ski practice. I haven't quite mastered this one yet.

After tromping in the snow and freezing our toes, while technically trespassing, we carried on to Syncrude. Is that bitumen I smell? Learn it well; the odor of money!

The site is so impressive at night. The lights made everything glow. We drove right into sight. Security doesn't pay a lot of attention this late at night. We took turns in Nick's hard hat, pretending we had real jobs.

Ahhh, nothing like having our own photographer along for the ride. One of the benefits of keeping tourists on retainer.

And back on the road! No lights yet, but we decided to make one more stop at the Wood Buffalo turn off before we headed back. The turn off had little walking trails with undisturbed snow. Pretty nice stuff. The guys decided to troop around while Jess and I stayed by the cars- you know, unless a bear came and we had to drive away quickly.

In some places the snow gets really deep...

Throwing snow? Really, guys, that's inspired.

Once reunited, we discovered that you can blow snow back up! When it is falling heavily and you face upwards and give a mighty puff, it just goes back up! Not shocking, but still cool too see. The only problem is that constant puffing makes you a bit dizzy, hence:

So no northern lights before the Germans left us all too soon.

The irony is that two days after our Germans left us- without getting to see the lights- we saw them outside the Germans old house. Just a quick passing glimpse, but still pretty amazing. It's a dream of mine to really see them, when they are bright and active and shimmering about. It's such a beautiful phenomenon. I'll let you know how it goes!

Step 18. Embrace the Cold.

So today it was -38, -43 with windchill. That is cold. That was so cold that it felt like my car had pebbles and corn syrup running through it. I thought it would be hard to get used to such shockingly low temperatures, but it turns out to be just fine, as long as you can find the silver lining. The cold turns out not to be a hindrance to adventure, so much as a catalyst to new types of adventure.

At -10 degrees it is life as usual. And so we are going to skip to the temperatures that actually turn heads.

At -20, you can begin to count on a clear sky. This is a good time to drive around with friends in search of the northern lights. Whether or not you will find them is another matter. Perhaps you'll see other celestial happenings, like snow angels.

"Hey Roman, you should make a snow angel! All Canadians do it!"

"Ja? Okay, zo here I goh!"

*physically challenging attempt at making an angel in 3 feet of snow*

"Ja like that Kate? You vill make one?"

"Do I look stupid?"

"I am going back to Juh-many now."

At -25 (-29 with wind chill), outdoor ice skating still counts as a (kind of) good idea. The windchill can really get to the face, however. After a while you cannot stop your nose from running, nor can you feel it. Please note, these were not our beer bottles.

At -30 (-35 w.c.), you can still go skiing. At this temperature, you can typically count on a clear sky. Frostbite on the cheeks is not unusual. Who doesn't love living 10 minutes from the trails?

At -35, you are still good for a solo hike, though you are better off to keep it short. At this temperature, you really don't want to expend a huge amount of energy or get your heart rate up. Breathing in hurts. If you don't want to get stuck “catching” your fiery breathe, you better not lose it in the first place. Sometimes the sunrise view is worth it.

As always, the camera fails to capture the beauty of it. It is just awesome.

As the cautionary tale goes, a young woman who was new to town went for a hike in these temperatures. She didn't understand the cold or hypothermia. After a little bit, she started to feel quite fatigued, so she sat down for a minute. That is where they found her body the next day. So I am careful.

At -40 (-45 w.c) you can barely hold the bolt long enough to lock the door without your fingers sticking to it. Nose hairs freeze between the car and the door. You have to run your car over lunch hour so it doesn't freeze up. The heat doesn't get warm till you've been driving for almost an hour. Your fingers burn. The metal of your earrings freeze while they are in your ears.

At -45 (WITHOUT WIND CHILL!!), you remind yourself you have nothing to prove, and hit up Starbucks.

Step 17- Call for Reinforcements!

Last time I wrote things were tough. And when the goings get tough, the tough fly up to Fort McMurray to visit the not so tough!

It was so good to see an old friend after facing all these very new situations. And thanks everyone for your encouraging notes! I felt so supported in what I am doing up here. Sometimes I struggle with aspects of this job, and I am learning to build 'healthy boundaries' and leave it at the office. It's like other job skills, though. It takes time.

So, in the mean time, I'm using the weekends as a chance to recuperate. And by recuperate, I mean have friends over and fill every possible moment with activity. Lexi came up to spend 3 days living the wild life. It was the best Fort Mac weekend on record.

The first thing to be noted is the LATE night dinner. In this situation, making dinner involved letting a bunch of young German men into the kitchen...

And letting them get to work. Oh man, I didn't even realize the very Mennonite seating arrangement till now!

And then there was the high stakes game of Ticket to Ride that lasted till 1:30 am. I won, handily.

After that late night, it was up nice and early to hit the slopes! I wanted to take Lex dog sledding, but XC skiing had to suffice. I think that was enough cold for one day.

It was, after all, -28. Sometimes it hurts to breath too quickly. So here you are, pushing through snow with your whole body, while simultaneously having to ensure that you never breath too quickly. I love it.

Just to be nice, we let her warm up at Starbucks afterwards.

Creme brule latte shooters! Hurrah for having a friend who works at 'bucks and hands out samples.

Of course, after skiing, and then chipping ice off the driveway when we got home, the only really appropriate dinner was whole chickens.

Now, lately, I've been seeing all my friends in beautiful engagement and wedding photos. And I wanted a nice picture of me! One that is unrealistically flattering. So Lex brought up the SLR and within 5 shots pulled out this beauty. Get a good look, because this one surprised even me! From here on out, seeing the real me will just be a disappointment.

So, with an outdoor adventure and a glamor shot, I am as good as new! Thanks, Lex, for a FANTASTIC weekend.